The toughest part about faking a smiling is faking it. And for me, I don’t like to be fake about anything.
Oftentimes you hear people say that it’s best to turn the other cheek or ignore someone.
Personally, turning the other cheek hurts more sometimes.
When you let someone off the hook, or choose to ignore something, you’re allowing the anger to build up. And eventually you’ll explode.
In my 26.5 years of living, I’ve had to ignore a lot and know when to stand up for myself or someone else.
I’ve lost friendships for being honest, but I’ve gained so much more.
And to me, that’s what matters most.
Taking A Different Approach
When I became a mother, I also grew a backbone. Not that I didn’t have one before, but I learned to strengthen it.
The thing about being a mom that makes you a lot tougher is having to deal with criticism.
People are going to criticize you throughout your life, but the day you have to stand up for your family is the day you will have a different kind of respect for those around you and vice versa.
I’ve had to put my foot down with several people in the past. You know, the ones who swear they know what’s best for your kid, yet their kid is running with scissors and hoping to cut everyone in sight.
Okay, I’m exaggerating, but you get that their child isn’t headed down the right path.
But I won’t correct them unless I see them acting out in front of me OR if they try any of their BS on my kids.
This mama don’t play!
Family and friends joke that my toddler is the poster child for what kids should be. And I’m flattered, but like most kids, he has his tantrums.
Jeff and I know how to deal with him when he does act out, and we’re both consistent with how we handle it. You know kids. They love consistency.
Even when we have to deal with someone else’s child, we’re kind about it.
The truth is, it’s not really the kid’s fault. Some don’t get the proper attention at home, and that’s typically when they act out. Of course there are other factors to consider about each child.
Dealing With Rudeness
I’ve mentioned turning the other cheek previously, but it’s important to note when you should stand your ground.
Rudeness is never acceptable, and you should always let that be known — in a nice way.
To help deal with rude comments I do the following:
Refocus the conversation on something else.
Say something funny.
Point out that it’s just part of life.
Bring up the fact that everyone is different.
By simply bringing up the last one you’re not only making it a point to let the know that’s not something you’d like to discuss, but you also tell them a known fact — everyone is different. We all deal with situations differently. We all raise our kids differently, and we think differently.
So when someone tries to bring you or someone you know down, be kind anyway.
18 responses to “Be Kind Anyway”
I wish more people thought the way you did. You are totally right – you never know what happens behind the scenes.
Thank you. It wasn't always easy to think this way. It's taken a lot of maturity.
Yes !!! Why can't everyone this this way I definitely consider myself kind 90% of the time.
Hey Laci, I wish they would. And I'm with you on that 90%. 🙂
I like your positive outlook on this – I also like to let people know, politely, when they cross the line of what goes on in our house. It can be tricky with family (and other children), but I find explaining why we (for example) don't throw toys at our house sets a good example for the children and communicates ground rules for the parents.
I love that Paula. It's not easy to explain it to kids, but you're right, ground rules are important. We do the same with our kids. What is expected of them in our home is expected everywhere else.
There is some really great advise in this post…. I might have to print this out for a couple of people who could really LEARN from this!
Thanks, Michele. No need to print, feel free to share the link 🙂
I feel you girl – I have had to deal with some (ahem) "difficult" people my self lately and it seems like people are just NOT getting it anymore. Regardless yes – we HAVE to rise above and move on but it can be sooooo hard 😉
Yes! See, you get it Laura! 😉
You have a great perspective and outlook. It's not always easy to be kind anyway but it feels much better than the alternative. And it's good karma.
Indeed. Good karma? I can get behind that.
Completely agree with this! Whenever someone is rude to me I just try to change the subject and move on.. I've found that in most cases it never makes me feel better to be just as rude back.
Yes! I get the same feeling when I'm rude back. I start replaying the conversation in my head, and eventually kick myself in the butt for not being myself.
I love this! Being kind, no matter the situation, is always the right thing!
Southern Soul
My mom always told me that when you put a smile on your face even when you didn't feel like it, you weren't faking it, you were surviving and being civil.
I have found that as I get older, I am bolder in my responses to others, and I don't hold in as much as I used to (in fear of hurting other people's feelings). Also, not speaking your mind is exhausting.