Loving someone takes courage. Being able to love them when things get tough is a true test of your feelings for your partner. This letter to my husband during difficult times expresses words I would like to tell him every day, but hold back because I know I can’t change how he feels.
It’s been more than 8 years since I met the man who makes me smile more than a sunny day on the beach. He’s the most loving person you’ll ever meet.
An honest friend to those who know him. He always finds a way to be there for those he loves and makes time for everything.
Lately, it hasn’t been easy trying to find hope in difficult times. He makes the best out of the times together, but I know my husband isn’t all there.
After losing our husky, he went from hopeful to doubtful. Work is a distraction for both of us, but also a reminder that you can’t really show too much emotion.
Everyone is dealing with their own hard times. Trying to get one foot in front of the other hasn’t been easy. That’s the thing about seeing a loved one in emotional pain. You want to do more for them, but you can’t.
Getting through tough times in marriage is easier when you can work together. Sometimes it feels as if you are playing tug of war.
The difference here is that you keep pulling at life, and your partner is behind you giving up on it.
It hurts most when it’s family on the other end.
How To Be Positive In Difficult Times
Learning to cope with someone else’s emotions can be tough. Finding hope in difficult times sounds easier said than done.
One of the reasons I chose to write for a living is because it’s the best way to express myself. In good times and in the bad, I can rely on words to help get my thoughts out.
Some of the ways you can learn how to be positive in difficult times is by doing the following:
- Think of reasons why you’re experiencing a tough time;
- Keep an open mind;
- Surround yourself with loved ones;
- Spend time outdoors;
- Go to places you enjoy;
- Write a list of things you can control;
- Get together with family;
- Write a letter from your future self;
- Arrange your things in a different way;
- Tackle something hard;
- Focus on your relationship with yourself;
- Reflect on previous years;
- Learn about something new;
- Write letters to someone you miss;
- Understand there will be bad days;
- Listen to music;
- Change your view on what’s happening;
- Be grateful for happy memories;
- Think of ways you can cheer someone else up;
- Plan something for the future.
Think Of Reasons Why You’re Experiencing A Tough Time
Some of the best lessons have come from difficult times in your life. The more you look into a situation, the more you understand the timing of these life events.
Tough situations can build character. When you think of reasons why you’re going through a difficult time, you’re giving yourself permission to go through the emotions and understand this journey in life.
Keep An Open Mind
Finding reasons why you’re experiencing tough times can bring up emotions you’ve never felt. This is when growth becomes an important part of the path.
By keeping an open mind, you’re understanding cause and effect. Things have consequences, and you’re better off embracing whatever lies ahead.
Surround Yourself With Loved Ones
Even in the toughest of times, you can get comfort by being around those you love. There’s a sense of relief knowing that you’re surrounded by people who are concerned with your well-being.
Those happy times together will bring up your spirits. This can help you analyze the situation better.
There are times when being around someone you love helps you open up about your situation and you can get feedback from them on how to tackle it.
Spend Time Outdoors
Nature has a way of teaching you the beauty of life. Simply watching the trees sway with the breeze or listening to the birds will help calm your emotions.
Those moments outside can bring you peace, even if it’s only for 10 minutes or less. Just like being around those you love, moments of peace can bring your mind some clarity.
Go To Places You Enjoy
Have you ever been to the beach just to walk or stare at the ocean? This is one of the ways you can find inner peace.
When you go to places you enjoy, you feel at home. Those calm moments make a difference and will help you appreciate the beauty in these special moments.
Write A List Of Things You Can Control
You’ll drive yourself insane thinking of the things you can’t control. The most you focus on what’s in your hands, the better off you’ll be.
When you write a list of things you can control, you’re giving yourself the power to make something go the way you expected.
Although you can control your emotions, it’s best that you control how you think as well. This will help you give power to your way of thinking about the cards you’ve been dealt.
Get Together With Family
It’s said that laughter is the best medicine, and sometimes that’s exactly what you need. Seeing a familiar face can bring up old happy memories.
By getting together with family, you’re giving yourself the opportunity to leave your emotions aside for a bit, and just live another day.
Write A Letter From Your Future Self
How you feel today won’t be how you’ll feel in the future. Understand that emotions will pass and you’ll be left with lessons.
These are difficult times, but you can still imagine the lessons you’ll learn from what you’re experiencing at the moment.
You can use the time to write a letter from your future self as a note that comes from a place of healing. Even a simple note that says, “Thank you for being there for me during difficult times,” is enough.
Arrange Your Things In A Different Way
Organizing your space is one thing. Making your area more functional is another.
By arranging your things in a different way, you’re helping your mind place your thoughts differently as well. It can also help you think of new ways to cope with difficult times.
Tackle Something Hard
Focusing on things you can control plays a role in tackling something hard. When you work on a task you’ve been putting aside, you’re strengthening your mind to deal with other difficult things in your life.
There’s also a sense of satisfaction that you’ve been able to remove this weight on your shoulders. It can also improve your way of thinking and how you approach other things in life.
Focus On Your Relationship With Yourself
These are difficult times you are experiencing. However, you can’t forget about yourself.
Taking care of yourself helps you cope with what’s going on. When you focus on your relationship with yourself, you’re reminded of the importance of self.
You can’t control anything outside of you. The best thing to do is to focus on yourself during these tough moments.
Reflect On Previous Years
This isn’t the first time you’ve dealt with hopelessness, and it won’t be the last. You can reflect on previous years to find answers on how to be positive in difficult times.
Looking back on the lessons you’ve learned from previous moments is how to stay positive in difficult times.
Learn About Something New
If you’re feeling up to it, trying to learn about something new can help keep your mind busy. It’s a great way to refocus on emotions on something else.
You can also do research online to see how others have dealt with similar situations. Even asking family and friends for advice can be a game-changer during tough moments.
Write Letters To Someone You Miss
Your words can make a difference. Not only can your words impact someone else, but it can help you as well.
Whether you’re looking to write to someone who is still here or someone who has passed away, it’s important those emotions out.
Sometimes by simply dealing with something else you’ve pushed aside can help you cope with something else in your life.
Writing your emotions can be therapeutic. It’s a great way to express emotions you probably didn’t know you had.
Understand There Will Be Bad Days
You’re only human. A lot of what you’re going through is part of life.
Although it might not seem like it, you’re not the first to go through these emotions. You’ll find inner peace by understanding there will be bad days along the way.
This journey into growth is messy — and filled with inexplicable emotions. How you cope with bad days will help you appreciate the good ones.
Listen To Music
Art has a way of imitating life. Music captures much of the emotions you never thought lied within your heart.
Listening to music can help with difficult times because it can remind you of better days. Sometimes the lyrics to songs about difficult times will give you comfort in what you’re dealing with at the moment.
Change Your View On What’s Happening
Having an open mind is one thing, but being able to change your view on what’s happening is another. You’re more likely to get a better understanding of what’s going on in your life by doing this.
Perception is everything when it comes to dealing with difficult situations. How you approach whatever is going on in your life is key to how it will impact you.
Be Grateful For Happy Memories
Dealing with tough moments can impact your level of happiness. Oftentimes it’s traded for an increase in stress levels.
Thinking back to happier times is always a plus when learning to cope with difficult times. Be grateful for happy memories, they can be a blessing.
Think Of Ways You Can Cheer Someone Else Up
Regardless of how difficult things might be at the moment, you can extend a hand to someone else. Being there for a loved one can make a difference in their day.
At times, you might feel as if you’re alone in what you feel. Don’t be surprised to see others dealing with other things on their own as well.
Simply offering to be there for them during this time in your life can improve how they feel. In return, you’ll be able to feel a sense of relief knowing you could be there for someone else.
Plan Something In The Future
Telling yourself about the future and what you’ll be doing when you get through your emotions is key. Sometimes the toughest part is just visualizing this.
The reason why it’s important to plan something in the future is because you are picturing those moments in mind. As you visualize them happening, you’ll be able to manifest them into your life.
One of the reasons why you can’t picture yourself getting through with what you’re experiencing at the moment is because you’re focused on the now. Now is important, but so is what will happen next.
When you place your focus on getting somewhere in life, you’ll be able to develop the necessary steps to get there.
Why Write A Letter To My Husband During Difficult Times
Much has happened in the past couple of weeks that has led to a whirlwind of emotions at home. Although it’s not the first time, these emotions are out of my control.
When you experience emotional pain, you almost feel like giving up on things. Not just everyday life, but even on the people and things that once made you smile.
You begin to focus on where life is today, without thinking of the possibility of seeing a tomorrow.
It’s easy to forget that there are others who are feeling similar emotions and can help you get through this path.
Emotional pain can be confusing. It leads you to think you’re alone in what you’re feeling.
Oftentimes, you trick yourself into thinking it’s okay to go numb. At the time, it might be, but eventually, your emotions catch up and you learn to unwrap them.
This is why I’m writing this letter to my husband during difficult times. His heart is breaking as he waits to hear the next step to his mother’s recovery from COVID.
I wish I could take his pain away, but I know it’s something he needs to go through. I’m here for him, as we’ve been able to cope with getting through tough times in marriage.
Learning different tips on how to stay positive during difficult times has helped me. I’m doing my best to bring him along.
Whether it’s off to the beach or out for a family walk. These simple things he enjoys get his mind off of what’s happening today.
In the 8+ years we’ve been together, we’ve faced difficult times in marriage. Times I didn’t think we could overcome.
Fortunately, by sticking together and finding solutions, things got better. But what happens when emotions are high and every solution leads to a wall in a maze?
You fight harder.
It’s scary to think that there are two paths for my mother-in-law. Regardless of what happens, I can’t take away what my husband is feeling.
Not being able to be physically present when someone is hurting makes it difficult. All you can do is offer emotional support over the phone.
Songs About Difficult Times
Music has been helpful for my husband and I in coping with everything going on. It reminds us of better times.
Discussing memories together have been a huge help as well. Music brings back those moments together and where we were in life.
Kenny Rogers, Frank Sinatra, Lenny Kravitz, Corinne Baily Rae, and many more have been playing at home lately.
Kenny Rogers’ music has always been theme songs to our time together. It brings out happy memories of when we first started our family.
Sometimes you forget how important being a supportive spouse is when your partner is going through a tough time.
Even listening to The Gambler will help you deal with difficult times. “The secret to surviving is knowing what to throw away and knowing what to keep.”
Life is a gamble. You have to know when it’s time to stick things out or let them be.
Marriage is like this as well, and when you love someone you think about getting through tough times in a relationship.
Frank Sinatra’s music brings me at ease, and it’s helped my husband too. Songs like Fly Me To The Moon and Come Fly With Me are reminders of what it means to join someone on an adventure.
Sometimes getting away for a bit makes a difference in how you feel. This is why I always like to plan outings together.
Making time for each other to step away from things can be helpful when getting through tough times in marriage. I’ve noticed a change in my mood since implementing more time together.
Cooking with Lenny Kravitz gives me the sensation I have nothing to worry about at the moment. Memories of times at the beach with the family always cross my mind.
When you cook in a good mood the food always comes out delicious. It’s like you’re pouring your heart into the dish.
Simply putting your records on makes a difference, and it’s no surprise that Corinne Baily Rae makes the list for songs about difficult times.
Whenever you hear Put Your Records On, it’s a reminder of what it means to love yourself and appreciate that journey into self-discovery.
Lots of change can bring confusion. When the going gets tough, putting on your favorite songs can help guide you through the emotions.
Another artist to consider when looking for comfort through music is Harry Belafonte. I remember listening to his music from Beetlejuice and hearing about him in Social Studies lessons. I never realized how much his music made a difference in Black history.
The style and lyrics to his songs were based on stories that helped with injustice. It also gave people who listened to his music hope.
You feel the joy in his music when you listen to the rhythm. You’ll find yourself turning up the music a bit louder each time you hear it.
There are other ways you can express yourself in a note to someone you love. Lyrics to songs you love or songs that remind you of your partner are perfect for sending through text.
Below is a letter to my husband during difficult times.
My Letter To My Husband
Dear Love,
I think of you often, and I find myself thinking of you most in difficult times. Mainly because I wonder how you’d deal with situations if it were you.
Placing myself in your shoes has been tough because I don’t know what to think as you look for hope.
At times I feel helpless, but I search for answers I can give you.
In the last couple of weeks, I’ve learned to just listen and let you vent your emotions knowing that it might not always be this easy for you to do so.
We’ve been through tough times, but not like this. Knowing I can’t help stop your emotions hurts.
I’d love to do more, but I’m also learning how to stay positive in difficult times without you. I know you want to be more present, however your emotions don’t allow you to be.
I understand the uncertainty hurts you, and I’m doing my best to remind myself of this. Despite everything, I want you to know I’m here.
I don’t plan on going anywhere, but you have to let me in on your thoughts. It hurts to see your eyes water and not be able to dry those tears.
Yes, you can still be strong and let the tears fall. It doesn’t make you weak to cry.
No matter how much I’ve searched online or asked friends who have experienced this, I don’t have the answers. It’s out of my hands — our hands.
You said it yourself — you can’t change the past, you can’t do anything right now. I see you struggling to get out of bed and you’re only doing it to keep yourself from curling into a ball.
Some days I want to pack the car and take you away from all this, or spend a week in Jersey just to let you spend more time with her.
Unfortunately, all this isn’t possible right now.
Tomorrow isn’t promised, but neither were the pastimes you’ve been able to overcome. Please let me know your thoughts, don’t shut me out.
I’m here for you and with you through this. I love you.
– Your wife